Hungry, hungry hippo

I'm at the Bangkok airport waiting for my flight to Colombo. I've got about 2 hours to go & give or take 100 baht to burn on my 'happy' phonecard. Today started off pretty chill but got all shitastic pretty fast. The plan was to take care of some last minute shopping, deal with the post office, have a late lunch & then bugger off. This was too simple to be executed properly.

I found some super, super cute postcards at the post office & couldn't resist picking some up. So for those of you who gave me your addresses I blame you for delaying me horribly. I had no intentions of spending my morning writing, but 13 postcards later...

And guys you've got to admit my postcard writing skills are pretty badass, I don't skimp & make use of all available space. Honestly I hope you will just lie to me & tell me that you keep all of them lovingly in a box because I'd be crushed if you tossed them. For reals. Plus, you never know, they could be worth something someday!

I normally don't eat breakfast, the picture above is what I subsisted on when we were in ko samed. (Yes, that is the view from the balcony, crazy eh?) Today I had some Thai pastries while I wrote away. Which is a good thing because I kept the leftovers in my bag & just finished inhaling them now. Man I'm starved.

After the postcard writing I grabbed a few last minute things for the ladies in my life, had a lovely lunch & then headed back to the guesthouse with ample time for a shower etc. Of course the minute I step outside it starts to pour and I can't find an empty taxi, the traffic is horrendous & I begin to panic.

My uncle's going to be mortified when he gets me at the airport. I had just enough time to get back to the guesthouse, pay my bill, throw my suitcases in & then head to the airport. I'm still wearing the crap I was in this morning. Linen shorts, a tshirt & flip flops. I am certain to freeze to death on the plane yo, also because of the rain my hair has a certain je ne sais quois about it. Not the good kind.

You know how I always 'misplace' shit at the worst times? I thought I lost the keys to my luggage, then I thought my passport was gone along with my watch and iphone. Then I feel like throwing up. This is what sucks about traveling alone & being so absent minded. There's no one around to tell me to calm the shit down.

Manheaven

If you want to pick up dudes under the cover of being a nerd, this is the best place to do it. Just trust me on this one.

Also, this was on Ko Samed island, wonder why they're referencing the mainland...

Miss Mary

Fortunately for us we got fed! Those are some sugar cookies, and that thing on the left is water! Genius! Or am I just easily pleased? Oh, and there were little packs of instant coffee, creamer, sugar and a straw at the bottom of the box along with napkins and a disinfectant wipe. The cookies, like the dried mango, were kinda assy.

Mmm

When hitting up the 7/11 before our bus ride to Rayong alby thought it'd be a good idea to buy dried mango. Clearly this was a fail. It also smelled like ass. You know, just in case that wasn't conveyed through her facial expression and all.

Excuse me...?

I had really high hopes for nice, cheap shoes...not feeling anything I've seen so far

Ok. I have gotten pretty lost in the last couple of hours but this 'Siam Centre' area is so self contained that it's all good. Plus I have no issues asking for directions. For some reason, despite being completely disoriented tourists often stop me and ask for directions. I find this really amusing. Generally I will laugh at them, wipe the tears from my eyes and sheepishly tell them that I myself don't know wtf I'm doing, but that really sweet little security guard over there? His English isn't so hot, but he plays a mean game of charades and is probably a better bet than I am at getting useful information. Then we'll usually chat for a bit, I will angrily explain that I'm actually not from America and the accnt they're hearing is Canadian. We will all look relieve at this revelation, bash America, obese American tourists and carry on our ways.

Next stop I think will be MBK. Alby and I hit it up yesterday but it was pretty late and most of the stores were shutting for the evening. Getting there is going to be so shitty though because it's not connected via 'skywalk.' Which for the record is a genius invention for keeping tourists out of the sweltering sun.

Maybe I'll grab a bite of lunch before things get insane with people. I have been up since 6:30 after all.

(originally pecked out at 12:03 January 7)

For the insomniac tourist

I'm a really light sleeper and usually if I'm woken up in the morning I find it difficult to go back to sleep. Alby left today bright and early at 6 in the AM, I was pretty zonked after an epic Wednesday that saw us back from Ko Samed and stuck in central Bangkok traffic for over 2.5 hours.

Oh and did I mention that I ass planted? On the sidewalk? In front of two bemused security guards? And alby, who just watched and laughed while I squirmed pathetically on the ground? Fortunately nothing happened to my camera or two lenses and the only bruises I sustained were to my pride. No trip is complete without international clumsiness, watch out Colombo! You've been forewarned.

Anyways, along with falling down at the most inopportune moments I'm also used to getting lost, all the time. So I figured since I was up so early to see alby off I'd make the best of my day and head into the city early. I've always thought the best way to get to know a place is to get lost in it and take public transport.

The cute front desk girl at my guesthouse pointed me in the direction of the Skytrain station with a little note incase I got lost. It had the English name of the station "Saphan kwai Skytrain Station," the Thai name and the phonetic pronunciation "Road fai fa sa phan kwai." Fortunately I made it there with no fuss, 35 baht and 20 minutes later I was hustling out of the Siam Centre station with hordes of bleary eyed office workers. Not a single tourist in sight.

It was 8:15 and the city was still a bit asleep, since it wasn't too hot I figured I'd walk around and take some pictures. Just outside of the station people were lining up for morning street eats. Things I thought were "traditional" lunch/dinner meals were going fast. I know I had local colleagues in Colombo who'd eat a rice packet and curry for breakfast. Maybe this is the same deal? Anyways while I was taking pictures a Thai lady sauntered up casually and started talking to me. She worked for the tourist bureau and asked me how I'd been enjoying my stay. She supposedly used to work for the Canadian Consulate in Bangkok and got really excited when she found out I was from Toronto. She pointed me in the direction of a free map and told
me to plan my day wisely.

And that's what I'm doing. Sitting at Starbucks with my Lonely Planet Bangkok guide and map figuring out the best places to go shopping.

Also, there are two Thai girls being hit on by an American from LA. But I believe that's a post for another time kids. It's a whole other situation. Ugh.

(originally pecked out at 10 am January 7th)

'No! Bangkok's Eastern Bus Terminal!'

We've sort of been relying on Lonely Planet's Thai guide for our directions around town. Alby and I had no idea what we'd be in for yesterday trying to get from Bangkok to Ko Samed but figured who gave a shit really, it'd be an adventure. So on Sunday morning we ambled over to the guesthouse office to find "Glory," the sweet front desk
lady and get directions. Or at the very least some names written down in Thai. No luck with that though because she was nowhere to be found and we figured we'd be able to manage on our own.

Um. Yeah.

Armed with a map we headed up to the top of the road with our backpacks. The two teenagers at the 7/11 (guys, that shit is on every corner here! It amazes me) seemed to know a bit of English so after a bit of pantomiming we managed to get them to write "Bangkok's Eastern Bus Terminal" in Thai.

The cabbie we found was pretty eager not to take us where we wanted, but straight to Rayong, which was the town we needed to get to. Alby and I both screamed "NO!" in the same tone of voice i use on Oliver and looked at him with what I assume is the steely faced determination Alby uses on her behaviourally challenged students. Eager to make peace with us he pulled out a photograph of himself riding a tiger. I'm wondering if I need to Photoshop myself into a picture like that too, if it's the universal sign of goodwill out here or something? I will take one for the team.

With the help of an American hippie we scored two tickets for what was promised to be a "luxury bus ride" to the sleepy seaside town of Rayong. Bus bay 106 at 10:00AM. (I know, that's a photo of bay 105, but my view was obstructed!) The people in Thailand have been so sweet to us so far. Neither of us have been harassed at all (unlike in Colombo) and when we got on the bus an elderly man asked to see our tickets to make sure we were on the correct bus. Even the ticketing agent double checked to make sure we hadn't effed up.

So off we went to Rayong feeling pretty confident that we'd be okay.

Oops.

I didn't realise until yesterday, when I actually took a look at my blog page, that everything looked so effed up. First off, genius that I am was sending "my email to blogger" thing to the wrong address. Kids, even though the domain maybe .blogspot the email address is .blogger. Who knew? Secondly, is anyone actually even surprised?
Anyways just to put things in some kind of coherent order:
1. I left Toronto on the 31st night
2. Landed in Frankfurt in the ealry hours of the 1st.
3. Landed in Colombo early on the 2nd.
4. Got into Bangkok early afternoon on the 2nd.
5. Left Bangkok for Ko Samed the morning of the 3rd and got here in
the afternoon.
6. Today is the 4th and I've got my ass firmly placed in a beach chair with a pool behind me, a clear blue sea in front of me, alby reading trashy tabloid magazines to the left (while my novel languishes), two leathery looking italians tanning on my right and a buffet of banana hammocks coming at me from all angles.

I think today is going to be a good day.

Cankles

Alby was sitting out on the balcony reading a book when Vichan and our hot pink cab pulled up to the guesthouse. She let out a high pitched scream (trademark alby), bolted down the stairs and was standing outside my door even before I had the chance to get out. Neither of us can believe that we're actually finally doing this trip. It's incredulous really. Even as I painstakingly peck this out on my iphone I have a hard time wrapping my head around it.

We pretty much concluded that although I was ready to curl up into a ball and fall asleep on the ceramic tiles it's probably be best for us to go out and explore instead of sitting around being tempted to sleep. I had a quick shower and off we went stupidly leaving our guidebook and maps behind.

I'm struck at how much Bangkok is like Colombo, but not. I was expecting it to be far more squalid. Maybe it's because it's the weekend but the streets seemed relatively litter free and in good condition. Vichan told me that the traffic is non-existant on the weekends so I'll have to wait and see if Thai tuk-tuk drivers are as bad as your garden variety Colombo type. The expressway from the airport into the city was impressive too. Parts of it had a very highway 401 vibe going on. But with tropical weather and palm trees. Speaking of weather, it's been perfect so far. The stifling heat and humidity that I come to expect from Colombo doesn't seem to be making an appearance here.

Alby and I set off at about 2 something, ordinarily that would be suicide in Sri Lanka. The only acceptable activity at that time over there is sleeping. First stop was the 7-11 for some supplies. It's amazing how they're EVERYWHERE. Obviously they don't sell any of the things we get back at home, but it's just jarring to me seeing them out here. Stupid multi-national corporations. I got a sim card for 49 baht that I will need to replace. The "Dtac" provider is craptastic, their network is still edge! And it's bloody expensive too. Today before we head out to ko samet I'm going on a 3g hunt.

From there we went to one of those weekend only markets. The disorganization, stench and shameless people made me feel like I was in Colombo. Poor, polite alby, she was in charge of the afternoon's expedition because I was so jetlagged and disoriented, but pushing through the crowds? I had to lead the way. I weave like a pro yo! Our haul was decent. Got these fantastic v-neck tshirts for 50 Baht and and a pair of sunglasses each. My haggling skills are a bit rusty but I did bust them out and they were useful.

I don't normally haggle when the price is fair, but if you're trying to rip me off on purpose? Hellz to the no! I'm holding off blowing too much cash on random market shit, but it was a fun afternoon and a good way to keep the jetlag at bay. We didn't get back until 8 and I was fighting trying to stay awake. So while alby sorted through her Christmas presents (photo above) I had a shower. That's when I noticed my ankles had swollen so much they were cankles. They still look a bit swollen.

It's 3:59 AM. I'm going to attempt to take a nap.

Oh dear.

It's been one of those weeks kids. One of those weeks.

Srs Bzns

It's been busy. Nay hectic. July is nearly over and I've only got a rather hazy recollection of wtf has actually happened. Between final exams, papers and the usual gamut of summer school bullshit, Alby left to Korea for two years, a dear friend was visiting Toronto on business for a month, I was coerced into helping coordinate a wedding and doing logistics for a church conference. Unsurprisingly I am totally spent and all I want to do is sleep. I decided to knock out for a quick half an hour nap today after lunch. Which turned out to be slightly problematic because I accidentally set my alarm for 3:15 AM instead of PM. Subsequently I did not wake up early enough to shake off that assy feeling that you get when you've hit a good deep sleep. Boo.

Instead of studying or working on a pending writing project (that has been languishing for a few months) I opted to clean up my living quarters on Saturday. My standard of living can be described as being squalid at best, but I have an excuse! Did you see that whole thing earlier about me being terribly busy for all of July?

Anyways, we know what happens when I purpose to clean. Not much. Behold the fruit of my labour below.

I had one of those make or break career moments last Wednesday. Problem is I won't know if my career has been made or broken as of yet and won't find out until after the Labour Day weekend. Yeah. That's right. Early September. I lack the patience to wait that long for anything and I'm totally stressing out. The only way I've found to cope with all of this is to plan. My one year life plan for my career now has three options and all of them hinge on the answer I get in September. Since it was a director that I was meeting at the company HQ, alby and I hit the mall the previous week and found the below gem. It came with a sash of its own, but I coupled it with my grandfather's cummerbund which I'm sure I've photographed before.



Moving along. When Labro got married in May I was tasked with getting a pair of 'metallic high heeled sandals.' I was wearing the shortest dress of all the bridesmaids and couldn't get away with flats. Four inch heels and one blue bridesmaid's dress later...



While shopping for the shoes I of course browsed around and found these. I have not spent so much on a pair of shoes in a really long time. Even though they're Aldo, hot dang I don't have another pair of shoes that's made out of Italian leather as soft. Plus I think mustard is overtaking torquoise as my couleur du jour. Funny story, the cuffed jeans that the shoes are on top of? 20 bucks at American Eagle. Only hitch? The length is meant for regularly sized people and are therefore close to four inches too long for me (and they look like ass with those gold sandals).



One of my many glamorous jobs at the wedding was to herd around 30+ people around a park. Wearing a sari was not an option. I can't even sit properly in one of those let alone traipse through a poorly maintained park. (Boo to you Mayor Miller! Resolve the civic workers' strike already!) I thought I'd stay true to the Tamil roots and opted to use some silk pavadai chattai material (that I picked up from Ram Brothers down Sea Sreet) as a skirt paired with a random ancient beaded cami from Odel. It worked well enough although some of the old aunties had a few things to say. But really, when do they not?



Alby and I hit up a Jays' game earlier on in July and both walked out desperately wanting either a Blue Jays hat or tshirt. Thanks to the wonderful folks at footlocker and their buy one get one half off sale I picked up one for myself and for her as a going away gift. That hat is now safely ensconced at her apartment in Seoul. I'm going to miss you so much alby :(



I haven't worn a dress since I was in grade eight. All of that changed this year when Labro forced me into one. Then alby and I found this one for 15 bucks at bluenotes. That's when the epidemic started.



I bought this one just before I saw Transformers 2. It was probably the only good thing about that day because dang. That movie was crappy. If I hadn't seen it at the IMAX I think I may have left the theatre.



Labro and I went up to Barrie after work on Tuesday to say bye to alby. Her flight was way too early in the day for us to go to the airport (which is a real bummer because I love going there). Her parents are moving later on this summer and there was a pile of shiz stacked up for Goodwill and look at who was right on top?! That bag apparently was originally her dad's from way back in the day. So not only do I have her kid sister's hand-me-down skates which belonged to Alby and a couple of cousins before her, but I've also got Ron's bag. Pretty sweet! Oh, the cardigan is from a hole in the wall in Wellawatte. Rs 300 bitchz!



I've got a thing for scarves. Aiya found this one at the dollar store of all places and it's pretty hype. It's got Madge circa 1988 on it, her image is black and on a backdrop of different coloured squares: pink, orange, green, purple, yellow and blue. The pink top-like-thing I picked up last week while looking for someone else's birthday present. I know. I've really got to curb the shopping. As my people would say, "What to do no?"



And then it rained.



So I fished out the best umbrella I've ever had, one that I got from Arpico of all places. I'm sort of convinced that you can't really compete with umbrellas that have been designed to withstand the monsoons yo. That shit is serious.



After I tucked the camera away for the day I sat in a ratan chair and watched the rain come down.



Here's hoping for a chillaxed August.

When I get stressed out I tend to have really insane dreams. Well, I shouldn't say really insane, but you know. Which I guess goes without saying because most dreams always do have a strong element of wtf. It is however that time of year in the summer semester where there are assignments galore and midterms. That means catching up on a condensed half a year worth of reading I haven't done. To make matters slightly more harrowing I need to point out that I'm a proud student at two different universities. So on Mondays and Wednesdays I'm at U of T and Tuesdays and Thursdays at Ryerson. Oh, did I mention that in the sea of books, papers and shoe receipts that is my room I have misplaced my faithful mouthguard. That ingenious creation that stops me from grinding my teeth and saves me from insomnia. My grinding increases with stress and the insomnia from the teeth grinding brings on the effed up dreams.

Last night I wanted to go to bed early, the weekend was hectic. I've been immersed in Victorian lit (and maybe this is the reason for the dreams? All the repression?!) and wanted to take a minute to send Alby a goodbye note before she headed to Memphis. With all this swirling around in my head I went to bed at an indecent hour and had this dream.

We were headed to London, but as usual running late, got separated and boarded the plane individually. When we were in highschool and went on trips, we were Those Kids. You know, the ones that unspoken-ly got the back of the bus even if they're the very last ones to get on? This plane was no exception. Lo and behold Alby, Labro, Copto, Whoren and even Hoolia were all at the back of the plane. Apparently Labro and I were headed to South Africa after London. (Which seriously, wtf. She's the least likely out of everyone to want to do that. Also, no husband either.)

As we buckled ourselves in for take-off, a flight attendant came by, confiscated my iphone, passport and copy of George Eliot's Middlemarch. (I'm actually frantically trying to finish reading that for my mid-term on Wednesday.) This starts a series of scandalised whispers between the girls because as in real life, I look like ass in my passport picture and the flight attendant was all kinds of good looking.

We make it to London and go our separate ways. Emily leaves me for South Africa and I'm left stranded at the Heathrow (an airport I HATE) because the aforementioned confiscated documents. I head over to a kiosk and try to passively aggresively throw a civilised shit fit. Finally the same flight attendant comes by, gives my shiz back and I get upgraded to business class. (You'd think I'd have fought for 1st class eh? Even in dreams I aim low.) In a Bollywood twist of fate he turns out to be my seat neighbour and he's reading Bleak House. He turns to me and asks if I understand anything about the intricacies of the Victorian-era British legal system. I attempt to explain (sadly it is almost a word-for-word repetition on some short hand notes I made on the topic for my mid-term. I had been going over them earlier on in the evening). We then turn our attention over to George Eliot, banter on about Daniel Deronda, Eliot's supposed Christian fundie phase and her general scandalousness.

Natch at this point, I'm all "OMG. THIS FLIGHT ATTENDANT IS LYK TEH BEST EVAH!!1!one1" Then it happens. He transforms into Optimus Prime and ruins everything.

So what did we learn from all of this?
1. I am a giant nerd even in my dreams and Victorian lit is still totally hot.
2. My subconscious is telling me that I should re-look at going to South Africa.
3. Seeing the new Transformers movie really is a must.
4. I'm sort of effed for my mid-term on Wednesday.

Screenshot from my twitter account.

I was driving home last Sunday around 4:30ish from Debbie's place in some pretty heavy stop and go traffic. It was a beautiful sunny afternoon, I was on the cusp of a rice coma and to prevent myself from falling asleep at the wheel I turned on the radio. Fortunately for me I was able to catch the tail end of the Strombo Show and he was previewing some tracks off of the new Decemberists' album, The Hazards of Love.

As I listened to "The Rake's Song" and mentally went over the day (I was dragged to a Bridal show), a Cheshire Cat type grin spread across my face. Of course I fully empathised with the narrator (despite not being 21 anymore *sob*). Ever since the general unwashed masses found out about Debbie's impending nuptials, Abi and I have started getting some crazy heat from all and sundry about "settling down." As I've mentioned in the past there's nothing unusual with that, but lately we're finding the renewed interest a bit harder to laugh off. Mostly because it's coming from people who should genuinely know better. Abi's a sweet, good natured person and you can generally guess how I, ever the commitmentphobe, have been dealing.

Alby was in town over the weekend for a few wedding related festivities and we got to talking about how last year this time I was in London. Being in a bit of a nostalgic mood here are a few journal entries from that time that've been in the vault.

March 4, 2008

It's amazing what can happen in a month.

Just over a month ago I was super stoked for my big move to London and my trip to Barcelona. Instead all the plans that I had and the way I had envisaged myself settling into this next phase of my life essentially got side swiped like a car at a T-junction.

Did a run to IKEA the other night with Thorn, probably didn't need to but I wanted things to feel a bit normal. Picked up some stuff to make my "room" a bit more habitable. I use quotes because I swear this place is smaller than my walk-in closet in Toronto. I felt lost last week, it's been years since I've felt that way.

Alby was totally aghast. God only knows what Labro would've done to me. Probably punched me in the face and told me to man up and find some balls. Just like how it's amazing what can happen in a month, I'm struck by how much has happened in a week. Tez witnessed The Panic which lasted give or take 2 days. But still, I don't panic to that degree ever. Things are starting to look up.

April 22, 2008

I have now worked at a grand total of 2 boutique ad agencies since coming to London. My lovely headhunter warned me ahead of time to brace myself for what would be an immense culture shock. Corporate whoring aside, working in London is a different beast altogether.

I have moaned and groaned about not being taken seriously because of my fluid identity time and time again. The weekend found thorn and I at a dingy club, unsurprisingly I was the only coloured person in the joint. Usually there's at least a token black person. Not this time. Some shitfaced cockney and one of his mates came up to us and in a vain attempt to pick me up asked me if I was black.

Yeah. Needless to say he didn't get very far.

And because the walk down memory lane didn't end there, here are some tweets (I feel like that's the only way to legitimise the above screenshot). Plus the vast majority of you wouldn't have even read this while they were happening since they're restricted. I hardly did any blogging while I was in the UK so here goes:

I have rediscovered twitter. less emo more happy!
6:40 PM Mar 25th, 2008 from web

I'm gainfully employed bitchz!
10:34 AM Mar 31st, 2008 from web

@drac I want to be intoxicated in some form or manner too! Just cashed my last lot of traveler's cheques. unpleasant.
12:45 PM Apr 1st, 2008 from web

@tezcat i'm wracking my brains trying to figure out the name of the green book on sustainable development is. Damn you Goodreads. Damn you.
5:12 PM Apr 1st, 2008 from web

I have eaten the best sammich ever. Who knew crumpets could be that good?
5:26 PM Apr 2nd, 2008 from web

Why is the washing machine making that noise? It's either going to flood the flat or burn it down. I will not be held responsible for either.
9:29 AM Apr 3rd, 2008 from web

Flatmate went drinking @ the tate+house party in the lower flat+really hot italians=a ditched Pula and fun times.
12:32 AM Apr 5th, 2008 from web

When asking about my Sat night plans the flatmate accused me of being the 'thinking man's nympho.' wtf indeed peeps. wtf indeed.
8:40 AM Apr 5th, 2008 from web

Correction: apparently it was actually the "cerebral man's nympho," because that makes it better.
9:08 AM Apr 5th, 2008 from web

I have a new British ghey bestfriend. weeee!
9:07 AM Apr 6th, 2008 from web

'Ah so that's what your initials stands for. I'm not going to be insulting & try to pronounce it'
5:56 PM Apr 6th, 2008 from txt

My new job sucks but is $ coming in. If 1 more person says I have a 'beautiful name' I may go Waco.
5:52 AM Apr 7th, 2008 from txt

flatmates are screaming "GOAL." Apparently there's a football game. I'm displeased. Trying to catch up on missed episodes of Project Runway
2:00 PM Apr 8th, 2008 from web

@TinyLF "PENALTY, PENALTY" is being screamed at horrendous volumes.
3:28 PM Apr 8th, 2008 from web in reply to TinyLF

the (football) hoodlums have no made it to the street.
4:08 PM Apr 8th, 2008 from web

I'm headed 2 a funeral in Brixton & the Black Crows are playing the Sound Academy. Bleh.
6:53 PM Apr 9th, 2008 from txt

Checking out guys at a funeral is so tasteless. Please feel free to disagree. Anyone?
8:12 PM Apr 9th, 2008 from txt

I have been informed that i need to know about quantitative research methods for tomorrow. wtf! I'm an arts student, we don't know this shit.
5:27 PM Apr 9th, 2008 from web

Job interview #459285. "Bring your passport" they say. Am I going to be sold into slavery? Who knows.
9:48 AM Apr 10th, 2008 from web

Another interview, another job offer, another "wtf a 1 year work visa?" another monumental PHAIL.
3:58 PM Apr 10th, 2008 from web

Applying for jobs in Toronto while I'm in London. Decidedly teh weirdness. How the mighty have fallen etc.
9:43 AM Apr 10th, 2008 from web

Gah. it has been a truly bipolar day. Interview at DDB London for an actual short term contract position.
12:18 PM Apr 10th, 2008 from web

The mater arrives at Heathrow in T -1hr15mins. Must get supplies.
12:53 PM Apr 11th, 2008 from web

Mater & the aunt are totally MIA. Only my family'll do this kind of shiz.
3:34 PM Apr 11th, 2008 from txt

Doesn't matter how old you are, having your mom around when things go to shit is awesome.
6:20 PM Apr 11th, 2008 from txt

Is there a soccer game tonite? Lots of hot boys in blue Chelsea jerseys
6:47 PM Apr 14th, 2008 from txt

Half a glass of wine shouldn't make anyone this giggly. Gawd. I need new friends
9:06 PM Apr 14th, 2008 from txt

Crazy bag lady screamed out 'go home paki' as I walked by. At least toronto homeless aren't racists. They are bitter though.
4:56 PM Apr 14th, 2008 from txt

'Just print out your timesheet on the printer called "sausage."' How can I possibly keep a straight face?
11:31 AM Apr 15th, 2008 from web

ZOMG! Hottest guy in London sitting next to me on the tube & I look like total ass. Why God? Why?! /shakes fist.
2:41 PM Apr 16th, 2008 from txt

Frenchman, French novels and conversations in French. Bliss?
8:33 PM Apr 17th, 2008 from txt

The hordes of teenage girls at the Primark on Oxford St must die. Or maybe i'll just cut them all instead? Teh rage. I have it.
3:38 PM Apr 18th, 2008 from txt

Do I srsly need another pair of kickass over priced sneakers? Should I be buying 'grown up shoes?' Heels? Psylog?
4:39 PM Apr 18th, 2008 from txt

Non-English speaking flatmate ftw! 'how do you say a transformers?' 'dude you mean transexual?'
11:42 PM Apr 19th, 2008 from txt

What a flipping sausage fest. Cutest boy in da house 'i really like your trainers.' I made the right choice!
12:18 AM Apr 20th, 2008 from txt

Comparing me to a Postal Service song & then telling me you like beer? I'm in love!
12:32 AM Apr 19th, 2008 from txt

When did doing lines in the livingroom at 6pm on a Sunday become acceptable? I'm getting old.
^:18 PM Apr 20th, 2008 from txt

'Mind if I pop my stuff at the end of your thing while I go for a wee?' Damn you British people, don't you realise? Innuendo is everywhere!
11:04 AM Apr 22nd, 2008 from web

Perhaps I'm just actually a 12 year old boy?
11:04 AM Apr 22nd, 2008 from web

I'm always lost. Yet tourists come to me as if I know wtf I'm doing and where places are.
12:21 PM Apr 22nd, 2008 from txt

Why is it that in any part of the world Sri Lankan Airlines is always out to eff you over?
11:00 AM Apr 23rd, 2008 from web

Tube? I will not miss you. No. Srsly I won't. There's no hope for reconciliation.
3:25 PM Apr 23rd, 2008 from txt

Damn you lolcats. I no longer know how to spell MOAR.
9:18 AM Apr 24th, 2008 from txt

Wtf do Italian fiends always have to travel in packs of 20?! If I hear Napoli 1 MOAR time...
2:07 PM Apr 24th, 2008 from txt

I hate taking all my gear to concerts. If you had any sense you'd know that my mac is low end, the camera is shit and not professional.
2:42 PM Apr 24th, 2008 from txt

The camera lenses are crap too. This is why I don't have a press pass you idiots.
2:44 PM Apr 24th, 2008 from txt

Contact highs ftl! I have the munchies. Loud Americans! Always ruining good music for everyone.
3:45 PM Apr 24th, 2008 from txt

Is it totally pathetic that I keep thinking I see my toronto peeps everywhere because I'm so excited about going home? A bit?
10:40 AM Apr 25th, 2008 from txt

ZOMG! Two geese are getting it on at St James park. I may throw up my sammich.
1:50 PM Apr 25th, 2008 from txt

Murukku & spanish rioja ftw. That's the way to keep it classy.
11:45 PM Apr 25th, 2008 from txt

Srsly you have to stop talking. No one cares. I don't want to hear about how you 'nearly scored' last nite. I was THERE & no you didn't.
11:53 PM Apr 25th, 2008 from txt

No he doesn't love you & you've never done coke you've just met your 2 glass of quota of wine. Stop with the paint by numbers psychology.
12:47 AM Apr 26th, 2008 from txt

Chelsea fans everywhere. They've overridden the tube. As if this journey wasn't going to normally be painful enough.
2:11 PM Apr 26th, 2008 from txt

There are cops all up in my hood because of the football rowdies. Hot men in uniform ftw!
2:26 PM Apr 26th, 2008 from txt

So apparently that big structure that I can see from my window is the Chelsea grounds. All of a sudden things make sense.
2:58 PM Apr 26th, 2008 from txt

Goodbye London. You were an utter bitch but I'll still miss you.
11:13 AM Apr 26th, 2008 from txt

Toronto. It is good to be in your familiar embrace once again but why does it still feel like winter?! And you feel a bit distant.
9:19 AM Apr 27th, 2008 from txt

/fin

philth

My failures at thoroughly cleaning out my room are well documented. The last time I attempted I got severely derailed because I found heaps of old things that I didn't know I had and then took pictures. This time an ultimatum was passed down by Ammi over the weekend. Under no circumstances was the new year allowed to befall without a complete clean up of the living quarters. What antiquated superstition she was trying to impose on me only God knows but I did comply. For very different reasons, but still.

1. Running out of clean clothes: scrounging around for clean socks and underwear at ungodly hours of the morning are not acceptable practice for someone who keeps everything so finely timed (i.e. does not roll out of bed until absolutely necessary)

2. Newly acquired clothing was going missing. Ditto for pairs of shoes. I could locate one while the other would be carelessly tossed into some corner not to be found until unneeded.

3. I was starting to get grossed out.

It should come as no surprise that having a steady paycheque has also meant a steady influx of new material possessions.


I rocked a sari for the very first time at V-mantie's wedding in October. I think alby may have very well nearly shit herself. Ammi naturally had to treat herself to some new threads as well because sari shopping with me was no easy feat. That scarf is the blouse piece from one that she picked up. The cardi's new and that t-shirt is an oldie but a goodie. Aiya bought it for me a couple of summers back and it's one of my prized possessions.


Yes. Yes. Poor Oliver. Enough. If he wants to lounge uninvited on my bed he must pay. So yet another fedora to add the collection of wool ones that I never wear. In my defence it was going on sale for 10 bucks at Urban Outfitters. How can you say no to a deal like that??


When does a super cute clutch ever need an explanation? That shirt on the other hand, it's a story in and of itself. It's actually an ancient Club Monaco shirt of Aiya's that I now wear as a wrap dress. Honestly, it's a men's XXL. There's not much else that I could do with it but I love the colour palette.


If I knew how to paint I'd imagine myself wearing a smock similar to do this while pretending to be inspired. One thing that's died very hard in my foray into bonafide corporate whoring is giving up the kitschy wardrobe. I try to mix it up as much as I can with faux-vintage pieces like this but sadly they only come out to play on casual Fridays. In my past life this would've been considered "meeting attire."


That inability to wear heels? Yeah. I still haven't found a cure for that debilitating disease yet. It's tough seeing Labro every single day at work and have her tower over me. Sadly the option of falling on my ass every time there's a lump in the rug really is not viable either. What? Flats can be hot too!


Ugh. What is up with the snow? You know all these weather peeps were saying that this year we wouldn't get pelted with as much snow as last but I think those mofos be lying yo. The last couple of days have really not been fun and from what I understand this week's not going to be overly pretty either. Thankfully I got my new boots just in time and believe me, sourcing these out was NOT an easy task. When it comes to winter boots I am uber picky. I haven't bought a new pair in over four years because I was totally in love with my old ones. (I got them from Gap kids!)


Mad Men is one of my favourite TV shows. It's interesting because out of all the shit you find running during the summer this is actually a show that Ammi and I can agree on watching. She sits back in abject horror and relives what it was like to be a woman breaking into the early days of the ad industry and lust after Ms. Holloway. Anyone who can get away with saying "décolletage" without coming across like an utter tool is A-OK in my books. If I had the above blouse and shoes around Halloween I totally would've dressed up as Joan. Alas both were rather recent acquisitions.


Vests like clutches? Never enough I say! Especially when they have been bought at 85% off the original price. Even I like to bargain shop folks. Don't be fooled.


Who knew that my new favourite pair of jeans would come from Old Navy! I sure as hell never did. Those shoes, I *heart* them but they're damn uncomfortable. I need to invest in some good insoles ASAP. Also, what is up with those weird veins popping out of my feet? WTF. I really hope it's the weird angle that I was holding the camera in because that's just creepy. From my vantage point I've never seen those before!


Handbag purchases fall into a category all on their own. Unlike a clutch I will not impulsively buy a handbag. The issue is that I hate carrying around a camera bag with all my gear shoved into it, I'd much rather have a roomy handbag. I feel a bit less paparazzo you know? This bag is parfait. It's got loads of space for my camera body, 3 lenses, external flash and even tripod attachment pieces with room left over for other shit. The best thing? I personally don't think it comes across looking like a massive Mary Poppins bag. Oh. The scarf I'm wearing around my wrist? A gift from Aiya. The only piece of Liz Claiborne in my wardrobe. Since my bed was occupied by a sleeping hound I had to take advantage of the parentals' room for this photo.


See above: inability to wear heels. Also, my current favourite pair of socks :)


I found this scarf tucked away in a bag of stuff that I hadn't touched since coming back from London. Man, talk about sentimental value. It was one of my very first purchases from the Salvation Army way, way back in high school. I'm pretty sure that I was with alby when I hunted this down and paid 75 cents for it. Technically not a new item, but a found one! That cardigan? Hah, I picked that up at a dodgy store in Wellawatte right across the street from the Savoy. Best 250 Rs I ever spent in my life.


I was in desperate need of a new winter coat. One day when I was waiting to pick up the fascist from the bus station I popped into the local H&M and walked out with an inexpensive winter coat. Natch I needed to get a bag to match. Incidentally those leather gloves are actually goatskin ones that I bought at Odel about 4 years ago. They're perfect for winter driving because I can't deal with a frozen steering wheel and these take the chill right out.

Domestication

Having Abi around as my only close Sri Lankan girlfriend means that we can have a heartier laugh over some of the more ridiculous elements of our culture than I could with, say, Alby. Since we're considered to be of "marriageable" age these days we find older, more meddlesome friends of our parents seeing the need to make comments on our varying levels of "domestication." As Abi puts it, they make it sound like we're feral beasts who've only just barely managed to be paper trained or something.

Cleaning is really not my forte, not that I'll never do it, I just don't derive the same pleasure from it as Alby does. If I'm mucking around in the kitchen I'll clean up after myself, but my room? An absolute nightmare, something akin to my locker in high school. However clutter in my living spaces drive me bonkers. I'm sort of like Monica but instead of a closet I've got a bedroom. I've been meaning to purge it out for sometime now and since we had a new cleaning service coming in this afternoon I figured that now would be as good a time as any. One thing I never take into consideration is my ability to get easily distracted. I start finding things, old clothes to try on, books which get skimmed through, sweetly scribbled handwritten notes on pieces of random paper...you know, the things that'll totally make me sit down and take a closer look.

It all started innocently enough. I swear.


I was told to run down to the basement and make sure none of Oliver's toys were on the floor before the cleaning ladies came. That's when I caught sight of one of Lokku Mammah's blue Barefoot shirts in a garbage bag. Aiya had claimed that shirt a few years ago and I was surprised to see it in the give-away pile that he had put together just before he moved. So I ran upstairs and tried to figure out a way that I could wear said shirt without looking like a tool. That was really the beginning of the end. I coupled it with my favourite pin-stripped vest and one of my grandfather's ties.

I love that shade of blue.


While rummaging through my scarf/tie rack looking for Papa's tie I came across this little tie. It belongs to one of my most favourite shirts of all time, which surprise, surprise I'm now way too fat to even poke a finger into. I practically lived in that shirt when I was working in Colombo. The stripes and the white take me right back to all of that. Note the absolute squalor in the background. (And apparently, I was told, my hair looks FAKE in the above? I know right? How dare he etc.)


Guys, remember when I was totally obsessed with the Beastie Boys? Oh. Wait. That's right I still am. I bought this hat right around the time "To The Five Boroughs" came out. It was my homage to them. This was the hat I was wearing when I failed my driver's test for the 3rd time, it was around Thanksgiving too. On a side note, if it was possible to hug Paul's Boutique I think I would. Also, Adam Horowitz? I'm totally single and available (age means nothing). Call me!


One of my favourite people in the world totally misjudged me and gave me a black and beige organza sari from Singapore. I love her to bits but not enough to even attempt rocking it. The sari went to Ammi but I held on to the blouse piece which has alternatively been on my bed and also used as a scarf. It is surprisingly warm and makes me giggle at the stupendous lapse of judgement.


This penchant for scarves of all sizes is like a filthy drug. I'm going to end up a toothless junkie because of it. Last summer in Colombo the bossman and I made a quick dash to Cotton Collection to pick out a shirt for some fuddy duddy meeting he was attending the following day. This little scarf was by the cash register for 100 Rs so he grabbed it for me. On our way out to the parking lot we were promptly shoved into a random saivar kade because the road was closed off for some minister. So we sat there and drank cups of ginger tea, shot the breeze and managed to leave without cholera. If I recall correctly this was the lovely workmate's favourite colour and he ended up designing the cover page of a report to match it. Perhaps that'll be my only real legacy in Sri Lanka.


The TinyLittleFascist used to always make fun of me because I had a tendency to wear something akin to a hijab when scampering around Colombo in tuktuks. The thing is my hair was a dirt magnet and it just made more sense to keep it covered up to avoid all the nastiness that would otherwise get trapped in it. I was immensely amused when I came home last summer and found that someone who had recently visited the Middle East decided it would be a great idea to give my Christian Fundamentalist mother an Islamic head dress. Fun times indeed people! I clearly wear it as a neck scarf and not a head one.


Really? Does the significance of this beret really need to be explained? If I need to spell it out then you don't deserve to know. However I will give you this, I've had it since I was in high school.


The very first vintage sweater I ever bought at Courage My Love. I think I shelled out 10 dollars for this beauty when I was in grade 9. Surprisingly enough it still fits but only because it's snug in all the right places. Trust me though, it could've gone either way. There's potential there for it to have looked horrific.


Most of the things that meant the most to my grandfather when he died went to my uncles and Thathi, which is totally fair. Aiya of course got the best stuff out of all the grandkids. I grabbed on to precious little that I could get hold of, mostly ties and scarves that the others weren't interested in. The above is actually a cummerbund which his bestfriend Carlyle brought back to him after a trip to London sometime in the early 1950s. It's starting to get a bit chillier out these days and I'm head over heels for the pattern on the cummerbund I figured that I'd start wearing it as an ascot in the fall instead of just using it as a cinch. Apparently it works? Both are cheating I know. Shh.


Again, I totally found this while rummaging. This is one of my favourite ties, I picked it up for 25 cents at the open Saturday market along la Rue Mariste in Dakar. Clothes and other items which people from the developed world hoping would go to needy people in Africa oftentimes ended up at the market for sale instead. I bought this tie along with 3 others, they were the first items I ever price-bargained for in Senegal. The rush of being able to haggle successfully in French? If there's any French speakers out there, you know what I'm talking about.

So it's now just after 2:40 AM my room still looks like the closet threw up and I'm left with the choice of just shoving my clothes off of the bed and onto the the other pile of clothes on the floor, sleeping on top of them, or just heading to the guest room to sleep tonight.

Choices.

Shutter Speed

Jebus. I'm too lazy to blog properly (surprise). I present you the last lightening speed month and three quarters through the eyes of that snazzy new camera phone which I acquired along with a haircut at Pacific Mall.


This is what Toronto looked like when I left. I had a week and a bit of do nothingness before I took off unexpectedly to Colombo for the funeral. The original plan had been three weeks of do nothingness interspersed with leisurely getting my shit together for the Big Trip to London. I used to take Oliver for a walk every day during that spell and this is what a typical day would start off looking like. Apparently Toronto's still sort of like this? Perhaps my parents are just big exaggeraters?


Thathi and I were walking through the Katunayake Airport on our way to pick up our luggage remarking how it sort of feels nice to be back in Sri Lanka despite the utterly unfortunate circumstances. Seriously, look at that snow covered horror above. Now look at those luscious bouganvilla flowers in my grandparents' garden. It was nice to get away from one of the worst winters on record. When Ammi and Punchy made it into Colombo the heat had already started, I managed to miss that completely. However there was a few insane downpours, nothing compared to last year when that bit of the Galle Road collapsed. But still. I do recall a very unpleasant trishaw ride with Mansage from the Cinnamon Grand to Agra which involved rolled up pant legs, leaping over puddles and rubber slippers (which were worn in mutiny).


While I'm not a huge cat person this is my homeboy. Kitty, for that is his most unfortunate name, and I used to have a mutual understanding. He was less than a year old when I came to Sri Lanka last year. In exchange for play fighting in the mornings before leaving for work he would let me cuddle him for a brief spell in the evenings when I'd actually make it home at a decent hour. Although he used to make an utter fuss, I know he liked it. His throat used to vibrate, with a normal cat this would be purring, but his autism prevents him from showing affection, and that's as close as he'd get. No noise at all. The morning that my grandfather passed away he bolted and hung out on top of the water tower for nearly 5 days. He still refuses to go into my grandparents' bedroom. I don't know what he did after I left but the little beastie used to curl up in a ball and either sleep with me on my bed or on the floor beside me.


The final purchase that I made before I left Colombo was an umbrella from Arpico (pictured above). You know one of those silver coated jobbies. I figured that going to London without one would be just plain retarded. Gayan and I sped over as fast as we could to Dehiwela the night before I left. I needed to be at the Commons for a birthday fête and final goodbye. It was sad, and rushed. Tears were shed sly words exchanged and then it was time to go. The night before Mansage and I had a very fitting and hilarious goodbye that began at the Coffee Bean meandered to Clancys and then a mad rush back to the Bean. He even kept the blubbing to a minimum. It was so not enough time to see everyone I wanted to and there were so many people that I didn't even get a chance to see let alone call. I've always believed that any trip to Sri Lanka has to be at least 4 weeks long otherwise it's an utter disappointing and rushed experience.


I am hardly ever late for anything. Usually I am ridiculously early. This is a trait that Alby and I have both exhibited since time immemorial. So when I landed in London from Colombo and came back to Thorn's place at about 11:00 PM we weren't really worried about me being able to make my 6:30 AM flight that next morning. Oh how wrong we were. I was flying Easy Jet from Stantsted and in a series of events befitting Murphy I managed to get to the gate just as it was closing despite having started my journey at 3:00 AM. It was one of the most stressful things evar. Spain was great though, Barcelona's such a gorgeous city. I've got way more pictures which will eventually be posted on flickr. Seeing Gaudi's work in the flesh was phenomenal. I found myself at Sagrada Família on Easter Sunday and it was so overwhelming. The religious significance aside, as a piece of art it just left me dumbfounded.

Generally I don't like buying lame souvenirs and what inadvertently started off as an innocent scarf purchase in Dakar has now become my "thing." I buy scarves from every place I visit, managed to get the two above for 2 Euros. Which I thought was pretty awesome and of course now I'm regretting not getting more.


Getting lost in a city is the best way to discover it. This is what I say because I legendarily lack a sense of direction. On this particular day I was waiting for the ex-workmate to finish off some shiz and meet up with me for a day of shopping. So I wondered around Leicester Square and found a section that sold antique books. It was like I had died and gone to bookheaven. If the exchange rate wasn't 2 CND to a Pound I could've easily walked away with the entire store.


Went and met Aunty C at St Pancras a few weeks ago. She came and spent the day with me from Leeds and couldn't have picked a better weekend. The photo does not do justice to how kickass that clock really was. The two of us had a great time just wondering around the city. I managed to get us spectacularly lost at one point when I took the map.



A carved rock outside the British Library. They had a whole bunch of them around the entrance.


I still can't get over how "British" everything looks.


Seriously, how cute is that? Mind you it would've been way better if my unsteady hands didn't go all parkinsons on me. There actually are red phone booths in and around certain parts of the city.


Okay, so it does rain here on and off but it doesn't bother me! Is there something wrong? Am I unknowingly prepping for life in Vancouver?


Camden has become one of my favourite parts of London. I spend too much time and too much money there.


I go to church in Brixton. How bad ass am I? Witnessed my first building fire. Must say I really was not impressed with the way the firefighters and cops handled things. But that's another post altogether.


Gigs! With Thorn! It feels like home. But not really. Live music always makes me feel like I'm at home, no matter what part of the world I'm in. The London indie scene is really good obviously. Different than the Toronto one for sure. I think the calibre of musicianship is much better here but the creativity is lacking. But that's just me. Also? British indie boys? zomg. ftw!


Some of the little sculptures and pieces of art that are found in and around London are just strange. This is very close to one of the first places I worked here. I mean look at it! It's looks like a giant hot dog ffs. Click on the photo to make it larger and see if you don't believe me.


I wish I had more money. Or conversely, I wish I was making some money. Did a bit of shopping today. Picked up some sweet Clarks for Aiya and decided to get a pair of shoes for myself as well. The dude at Footlocker was absolutely incredulous when I told him that my feet were a size 6 US. This is normally the case since I think I defy some sort of science laws. There is no way that someone of my size should be able to be held up by feet that are so tiny they look like they've been bound.

Plenty more things that need to be seen and explored. Of course I'll take 'actual' pictures with the Nikon eventually, I'm really digging the little Sony though. I usually don't die for electronic items, but I'm a fan of the camera. It's so convenient.